9 Ways To Give Your Confidence A Kick In The Ass

If you’re here looking for confidence, I’m going to let you in on a secret

You never lost your confidence. Children aren’t born to be self-conscious, doubtful, and unhappy with themselves. When we’re kids, we’re not interested in how we look or our abilities or our intelligence.

Outside influence is what instills the toxic habit of low self-confidence. It could have been failures, harsh realities, family, or terrible friends and teachers.

Whatever the reason, you don’t have to fret about building it back up or finding it again.

Your confidence never abandoned you, and you didn’t abandon it!

All you have to do is some reverse mindset training. This gives you the ability to backtrack on the years you’ve built up the opposite.

And remember, just because you have low self-confidence, it doesn’t mean that I’m labeling you as self-loathing or weak. There isn’t a soul on this planet who hasn’t battled low self-confidence at some point in their life no matter how well they’re doing now.

1: List everything you like about yourself (and I mean everything)

Your eyes, the way you laugh, how you talk, how much you know about a certain topic. I want you to go all out. No one is watching you write!

Please don’t skimp on yourself with this one. Anything you know that you like or love about yourself has to go from your head to paper. As you grow more comfortable with admitting these things, the longer the list will become.

There are so many things about you that you should be proud of.

2: Treat yourself to things you enjoy

I firmly believe that self-confidence is one of the best self-care practices you can make a habit of. When you allow yourself a break to relax and have fun, you may not be aware of the positive effect this has on the image you have of yourself.

“Treat yourself like someone you are responsible for helping.”

Jordan Peterson, 12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos

And when you’re responsible for helping someone, like a child, pet, parent, or friend- you do nice things for them for no reason.

Give yourself the same amount of thoughtfulness.

3: Recite confidence affirmations

A popular saying goes along the lines of:

“If you tell yourself something enough times, it becomes true.”

This is why affirmations are so powerful.

Go ahead and think up or find affirmations on the internet to recite to yourself every day, or keep them within your vision wherever you look the most. I like to put them on my desktop wallpaper as a sticky note.

At first, you may have the affirmations running through your mind with doubt they’ll actually work. But eventually, your brain will let the words settle in.

4: Listen to music that makes you feel like the ‘main character’

This may sound a bit silly, but it’s a distinct feeling that music often gives people.

Music is great for our brains anyhow.

“Music literally changes the brain. Neurological researchers have found that listening to music triggers the release of several neurochemicals that play a role in brain function and mental health: Dopamine, a chemical associated with pleasure and “reward” centers, stress hormones like cortisol, serotonin and other hormones related to immunity, and oxytocin, a chemical that fosters the ability to connect to others.”

Healthline- The Benefits of Listening to Music

But listening to the kind of music that can boost your confidence is a whole new world in itself.

Collect as many of your favorite songs, albums, and bands. Using a digital platform is extremely helpful with this.

When we struggle with confidence, oftentimes we can feel like we’re invisible or insignificant. Music that’s special to you can change the tune (pun intended).

5: Take care of your body

Your body and mind are the mothership of your life. Neglecting them makes you feel guilty and unmotivated.

Take time for self-care. Do little things that make you feel better throughout the day, like eating a good breakfast, getting outside, or washing your face.

You’ll feel proud of yourself for putting in the effort, and in a better state to continue the habit.

6: Celebrate your accomplishments

There’s a huge difference between being arrogant and proud of yourself. Toot your own horn once in a while.

Think about it. Yesterday, you were dreaming and planning. Today, you’re doing your best. Tomorrow is on its way!

Look at your life and spot the silver lining of what you have achieved. When you recognize these facts, it will push your head into a state of vital realization. You need to recognize what you’ve already done in order to move on towards bigger and better things.

7: Dress up, dress down, or whatever makes you feel good

You have a sense of style that’s unique to you. Do you let yourself explore this aspect of your personality, or do you shove it to the sidelines?

You might be worried that it’s vain to enjoy dressing up. Or, you’re always fussing with your appearance, when in reality you want comfort. Maybe you’re worried about your weight or height. God forbid the people around you don’t like your style.

Screw that noise. Dressing how you want, wearing certain types of makeup, or doing your hair the way you like, is part of what makes you, you. It can significantly improve your confidence to bring the inner you out.

(Just remember that when seeking inspiration, don’t use sources/influencers that make you feel down.)

8: Do something nice for someone else

To feel better about ourselves, sometimes we need to start with others. This may sound contradictory, but it’s far from it. You’ll like yourself more when you make the lives around you a bit lighter.

It can be someone you know or a total stranger. It can be on social media or out and about. Both big and little gestures can mean a lot to people even if you never know their inner feelings or thoughts.

Be genuine and human. See what happens next.

9: Fake it ’till you make it

You don’t have to revitalize your confidence momentarily. The habit of a confident mindset is unique to the person. Don’t let this stop you from jumping in headfirst.

Faking it ’till you make it works better than most people realize. If you ask yourself what you would do if you weren’t so unsure with your abilities, go ahead and do that thing. Act that way, say what you’d say.

Eventually, these habits will trickle into your behavior, and you’ll trick yourself into becoming who you were pretending to be.

It’s all about rewiring your brain’s perception.


Stop envying your ‘confident friends’. Stop wishing that you were just ‘one of those people’. There is no reason why you can’t turn yourself around for the better. Confidence is already in you, and like a muscle, has to be exercised to be at its best.

Don’t get discouraged at how long it make take, and try experimenting with what makes you feel more confident.

It’s not a matter of if you’ll become more confident- it’s a matter of when.

Before you go, here’s some questions:

  1. Do you believe yourself to be a ‘confident person’. If no, why not?
  2. Why are you on a mission to revitalize your confidence?
  3. Why do you believe your confidence is at the level it is?

Be sure to check out my other posts, and follow me on Twitter!

Thank you for reading, and take care.

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